Feelings Come and Feelings Go: A Lesson for Everyone
One of the biggest takeaways from Daniel Tiger is a simple phrase: “Feelings come and feelings go.” I’ve repeated this line so many times to my kids—and to myself—when emotions are running high.
It’s easy to get caught up in the intensity of a moment, whether it’s a toddler meltdown or a frustrating day as a parent. But this little reminder helps shift the mindset. Emotions are temporary. They don’t define us. Most importantly, they don’t need to control us.
When emotions take over, it’s easy to spiral. Stepping back and remembering that feelings are temporary can help us regain control and respond more intentionally. This simple shift allows both kids and adults to navigate emotions in a healthier way.
What I’ve Learned from a Kid’s Show
I never expected a children’s show to help me become a more patient and understanding parent, but Daniel Tiger has done just that. It teaches emotional intelligence in a way that sticks—through songs, repetition, and simple phrases that even young kids can grasp.
Some of the most helpful takeaways include:
Teaching Emotional Awareness
Instead of shutting down big emotions, helping kids name their feelings allows them to process them more effectively.
Saying something like, “I see that you’re feeling frustrated” helps children recognize their emotions rather than becoming overwhelmed by them. When emotions are acknowledged, kids feel understood and are better equipped to express what they need.
Encouraging Self-Regulation
Teaching kids simple strategies for managing emotions empowers them to handle frustration in a healthy way. One effective technique from Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood is: “When you feel so mad that you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four.”
This approach gives children a structured way to pause, reset, and regain control—an important skill that benefits both kids and adults.
Normalizing All Emotions
There is no such thing as a “bad” emotion. Feelings like sadness, anger, and frustration are a natural part of being human.
When kids understand that it’s okay to feel these emotions, they are less likely to suppress them and more likely to process them in a healthy way. By reassuring children that all emotions are valid, we help them develop emotional intelligence and resilience.
Breaking the Cycle: Why This Matters
Many people grow up without the tools to express emotions in a healthy way. Instead of being guided through their feelings, they are often told to “calm down” or “stop crying,” which can lead to suppressing emotions rather than understanding them.
As parents, caregivers, and educators, there is an opportunity to break this cycle by teaching children that emotions are natural and should be acknowledged rather than dismissed. Helping kids recognize and process their feelings fosters emotional intelligence, resilience, and healthier communication skills.
Why Kids Need Space to Process Emotions
We touched on this in Episode 57 of the Babies and Business Podcast, where we discussed the importance of giving your partner space when overwhelmed. The same applies to kids.
When we rush to shut down their emotions or fix things for them, we deny them the opportunity to process what they’re feeling. Just like adults, kids sometimes need space to work through emotions in their own way, with the reassurance that their feelings are valid.
When we validate children’s feelings, we teach them that emotions are normal and manageable. Instead of feeling ashamed of their big emotions, they learn how to process them, making them more resilient in the long run.
How I Apply Emotional Intelligence in Parenting
Thanks to Daniel Tiger (and a lot of trial and error), I’ve found a few simple ways to encourage emotional intelligence in our home:
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Name the emotion: “You’re feeling frustrated because your toy isn’t working.”
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Validate their feelings: “It’s okay to feel upset. I get frustrated too.”
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Model self-regulation: If I’m overwhelmed, I say, “I need to take a deep breath before I respond.”
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Give them tools: “Let’s take a break and do something calming together.”
These small shifts make a huge difference. When we approach emotions with understanding instead of resistance, our kids feel seen, heard, and supported.
Helping Kids Navigate Big Emotions in a Healthy Way
Raising emotionally intelligent kids doesn’t mean they’ll never have meltdowns or struggle with emotions. It means equipping them with the skills to navigate their feelings in a healthy way—skills that many adults had to learn later in life.
The next time emotions run high, whether with your child or even within yourself, remember: Feelings come and feelings go. This simple yet powerful lesson benefits both kids and parents, helping create a more supportive and understanding environment.
