Isn’t it amazing how a single frustrating moment can sometimes impact an entire day? It’s not a matter of if those moments will occur, it’s a matter of when. Today’s episode is all about coming up with creative ways to sidestep (versus solve) insurmountable roadblocks to ensure the work gets done, and everyone is happy.

Show Notes:

[03:31] A critical difference between an only child and someone with 10 siblings

[05:26] How even ‘positive’ values can create resistance to change

[08:15] How changing the environment can shift mindset 180 degrees, instantly

[10:31] A great example of how optimizing something at home can dramatically increase work productivity

[13:16] Embodying your own values and setting an example for the team to live them

Episode Transcription

Below you will find a transcript of this entire podcast episode. Enjoy!

Avram Gonzales: Welcome back it’s Avram and Rachel. Rainy day here in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Got another fun story for you here today, I think that illustrates the importance of optimizing your roles in your business or recognizing when other people in your organization might be struggling and how you could remove roadblocks for those people. I hope you enjoy

the frustration that I had, but then the glory of what we’re about to share with you here.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah, I think that, this episode is going to really embody not really having, really rigid things around how things happen and how things are done. Uh, sometimes you need that rigidity, but I think that in this episode it can show how sometimes innovations are really, really helpful.

Avram Gonzales: And changing the way you do things.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah, just look at things differently. Choose to do things differently.

Avram Gonzales: So we’ll take you back to a Monday morning. We usually have our team calls on Monday mornings. Followed by once a month, Rachel will go out and go for a walk with a dear friend of hers. Get some lady time in.

And during that time that Rachel was away, I had the pleasure of hanging out with Lincoln while he had just started teething. So this was like a couple weeks ago and he was not having a very fun morning with that. So Rachel’s out, he wakes up from his nap. I’m, feeding him. And then he is basically inconsolable about doing anything that he would normally like to do.

So. It was just one of those days for me, where it was really starting to get to me, just him crying all the time.

Rachel Gonzales: Had you eaten by then?

Avram Gonzales: I don’t even remember. Was that at play that day?

Rachel Gonzales: I don’t know, but that’s one of the things that we have to take care of for you in order to set you up for a good day. So if that didn’t happen, that could have been a contributor.

Avram Gonzales: Be like, look, The episode, we don’t even need to record the rest is to, the moral of the story is eat before you have to babysit, right?

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah. So That could have been one of the things, but regardless. When I got home from this walk, I walked into the door and I saw Avram’s face. And I knew that Lincoln was approaching teething. Uh, it’s been kind of threatening for months it’s felt like, but, I saw your face.

And I knew at that moment that, you needed to get work done. There were things piling up on your plate and you needed to not do it here because it would not be possible. You were already to a point. I could just see the, the distress on your face.

Avram Gonzales: I can’t focus too well with a lot of noise.

So I grew up an only child. I think that contributes to it. You grew up in a household of 10 siblings. It’s like nothing to you. But man, just dropping into a zone of focus can take me a good 10, 15 minutes sometimes. Right. And every time he would cry or need something, it would break my focus in concentration and you’re right.

I felt this mountain of responsibility that had already been building even before this day of just certain things that needed to happen in our business that I knew other team members specifically were waiting on me before they could work. Right.

So everybody was waiting on me for a handful of things that just weren’t getting done. And today it looked like that was gonna not happen again.

 

Rachel Gonzales: Right. So a lot of things were building.

And the wonderful thing that happened for me was I was able to walk in fresh from having just had a great time with my girlfriend and I was able to see, diagnose, and come up with a solution all in one thought.

So I suggested to you in that moment.

“

Avram. I think you need to get ready and you need to go out, go to a Starbucks, take the computer, take the laptop that we have and get some work done.”

Not just some work, but I sent you with a specific checklist, a mission. You were goi ng to get these things done and there was no ifs, ands or buts about it.

And when I told you that, what was interesting is. I think initially you, um, kind of rebelled.

Avram Gonzales: Yeah, I was resistant to it.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah. You you didn’t really love the suggestion. But I could actually see the. stress and all the things that I could see in your face when I walked in, just melt away a little bit.

So I could see that I was on the right track and that it was all these different things that you weren’t really like knowing were all building up. Maybe.

And sending you out. I thought sending you out was just wonderful. What were your thoughts on that? You mentioned that you had some resistance?

Avram Gonzales: Well, since Lincoln was born, I think one of the things that we’ve taken pride in, and you know, listening to a couple of our episodes, you’re aware of just how proud we are, that we’re not working ourselves to death in our business.

We’re not engaged in the entrepreneurial grind, hustle culture. We’re just not like that. And the reason we’re not like that is because we so much value this time that we’re spending to build our family together.

And so you were sort of in your suggestion, I think threatening or stepping on my pride. In what I, what I saw for myself and what I can contribute to our household. Which is, I’m gonna be a very present dad. Yeah.

Which kind of sounds funny I think when I say it out loud right now, when I think about how I was feeling that day. Cause I wasn’t present anywhere that day, because I was just frustrated by what I knew needed to to be accomplished.

That’s why I was resistant at first. It’s been almost a year and I’ve not gone outta the house to get things done. Why?

Because the priority is being here at the house and being with you guys.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah.

Avram Gonzales: I also was battling with the feelings of abandoning you.

Rachel Gonzales: Mm. Okay.

Avram Gonzales: To be with him for the day. Like it’s all on you.

Rachel Gonzales: Sure.

Avram Gonzales: Because for the first year, we’ve been very much in it together and, you know, quote, “equally handling the responsibility.” Again, if you’ve listened to some of our previous podcasts, we don’t really divide things up 50/50. Um, but we just put our full effort in.

Rachel Gonzales: Well, I think that’s a great summary of like your viewpoint of what was going on and, when I had seen your distress when I walked in the house I thought, “Wow. Okay. You know, this wasn’t my vision of the day,” but also it was like, oh, I get a day with Lincoln. That sounds great. I will be able to be more present with him because I know you’ll be more present where you are and feeling more fulfilled. So I saw it being a win-win for both of us.

Actually all three of us, because I knew that if you were able to do the things that I sent you out to do, you would be more present. Just by the very nature of getting it done.

Avram Gonzales: I was so fired up when I came back home, I mean, I was only gone for like three, three and a half hours at the most.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah.

Avram Gonzales: And uh, cleared the deck for all these other projects and fun things that we had that were waiting behind some essentials.

Rachel Gonzales: And it was like really, really focused work. Like you were able to, like you said, drop in, you were able to be very, very present, get the stuff done. And then you were just simply done.

So, you know, you talked about your resistance, you talked about all these different things. And in the end though, I think that something really, really cool happened.

There was a shift that happened. You started the day a certain way, and you ended the day a different way. I’d love for you to speak about the contrast, maybe of how it started and how it ended, and maybe what contributed to that change.

Avram Gonzales: That’s a great question. Obviously started turbulent. Rocky. I felt very frazzled. That’s definitely the word that I would describe how I felt. When you came back home, was just frazzled. And I thought, man, there’s no, like, how am I gonna rally my mindset to even handle the rest of the day.

Was sort of where I started. Where I ended was just feeling triumphant. I don’t know if you remember, but like

Rachel Gonzales: I do

Avram Gonzales: I came home. I was, I had so much extra energy at the end of the day that I don’t, maybe don’t normally have. And just ranting and raving and just, I felt like I was being the visionary of our business.

I was very much in my happy place because now I had nothing left in my mind. I was able to be dreaming again. Talking about the future like I like to do. And just being in my, my happy place, feeling fulfilled. So you really saw that it was. What was going on that day was bumping up against my, my soul and what I, what I needed to feel content happy and fulfilled.

And you gave me that by pushing me to consider something different. And I look at this and I think, what a brilliant example this is of not only optimizing our home.

You changed something about the way that we operated the home that day. But you also optimized the personal resources that we have available. And this example, it was me.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah.

Avram Gonzales: And there were certain things about how the day had been se t up in the working environment that were not allowing me to be productive and efficient at my role.

And I think that’s kind of what this was all about was seeing that there was a roadblock. Not falling for the symptoms of the roadblock. The symptoms were like, well, the baby’s crying and he’s frustrated.

But the real cause was, there’s a certain amount of work that everybody’s depending on right now and that he’s stressed out about, that if it just got done, would change and solve everything.

“So what do I need to change in order for him to be productive?”

I gotta help him with his mindset right now. You just so happen to not have to really coach me through it. You just ended up saying, “Well, you need to go out,” here’s why you didn’t tell me that.

I think oftentimes we think that we have to like do some mindset coaching or shifting for a team member. But oftentimes it might just be giving them a simple assignment that can give them a totally different perspective.

So walking outta the house, I had a different perspective. I was able to find the focus and that’s really what you were aiming to do.

You optimized the home and the business at the same time, because when I came back we were also happier, harmonious, and just very pleased with ourselves.

Rachel Gonzales: Yeah, absolutely. I think too, sometimes it’s just knowing that there’s a roadblock and offering a solution.

Sometimes it’s, uh, maybe you are the roadblock, whatever it is, but like, we’re talking about like the innovation, what is that thing that’s keeping you from that thing?

You know, for you, it was so much, and I had the ability to literally remove that roadblock. There were a couple of roadblocks. It was time, and your ability to focus.

I knew that I could provide you with both of those things by going out and giving you a mission.

Avram Gonzales: Right. It was more important in that moment that I get these things done. That was more important than, oh, we’re both able to work today. Yeah, So that was the other thing was like this sacrifice of, well, if I go out then she can’t do anything. But you manage the resources that were available, the time that we had, in a brilliant masterful way. And I think it gave people a good example of just how small tweaks or a different look at things can really change how powerfully individuals on your team and, in your business show up, even in your household.

Rachel Gonzales: I agree. And I, I have one last thing to say, and that is. I think that it’s really, really important that we also embody what we want our team to have. We want them to be present if they’re at work and we want them to be present if they’re at home. And we allow ourselves the same thing.

So I, in, in that day, I thought, I want you to be fully present at work. So how do we get that? And I want to be fully present with Lincoln.

So whoever’s with Lincoln, let’s let them be fully present and whoever’s working, let them be fully present.

I mean, fully present is really the thing that I have going through my head a lot. And we, I think that we just really accomplished that.

Since then I feel like you’ve been able to be more present at home when you’re here more present at work when you’re at work or doing the work that we do. And that’s a huge win. That is what we wanted.

Avram Gonzales: Yeah. Now I just go out, um, after particular appointments and things that are set in my schedule. Maybe a total of two to three hours each time, twice a week. And that’s actually been enough to completely move mountains and change our outlook.

Go from being on defense in the business and, and, and engaging things on a daily basis that we have to do right now or else and shifting into really being on offense and doing the things that we want to do each day, because all of the other responsibilities and things have been taken care of.

Man, what a great episode. We appreciate you hanging out with us here today. Listening. Sharing in, um, you know, things that we’ve learned in our day to day.

And so with that, we’d love to ask you to subscribe to our podcast. Go to apple, leave us a review. Those things will help us get these stories, these lessons out to more entrepreneurial parents that are trying to find their own way.

That’s what Babies and Business is all about. If you got questions for us, send them to us via the website on social media, you can find us just about everywhere, @babiesandbizpod.

We appreciate you being here today. We’ll catch you on the next episode.

Rachel Gonzales: Bye for now.